He was like a large teddy bear, all wrapped up in Christmas paper for you. Just when you thought no one cared in the world – there he appeared bounding happy and caring, a gentleman to you.
And he sat there and said such wonderful things - how smart you were and "hey look at this" and you could almost guess what his family makeup was. He had a brother for sure, but no sisters. You could tell by his confidence and his smile that it was internally happy. Just everything about him was happiness and deep caring. And you deeply cared back.
You could get lost in his ways – how he worried about you and cared for you and wanted to be there for you in your dire moments.
And you sat there and whispered to him things that you should not really say, softly into his ear, because hey – you had both come from the same background anyway.
20 years of the same stuff it seemed, and jointly between you was a smile and a deep caring that only you two would know.
And you knew instantly, even with this caring that there was a danger in getting caught in it – too close. Falling into that bliss of togetherness and wonder – something you had experienced before and now immediately knew again. And you had both swapped telephone numbers, you knew how to get hold of him, you just knew.
And to you he was paradise, love lost, heaven, a Rolls Royce, wonder and amazement all rolled into one. And you knew from that point, that immediately you had to leave for this strawberry in your life - was not to be eaten, even if it was covered with chocolate icecream. But you kept his number and wrote about him secretly and remembered him and you knew, you would remember him for the rest of your life, and past eternity.
And even then, you wondered - is he evil – is he the Monster? You questioned it, it annoyed you, you wanted to know that deep down, that caring was real, that he was not some evil monster, out to get you, a fake, a horrid evil scrawny thing ready to pounce on you at any moment.
This is why you ran. Not for any other reason, it was just too much to realise what you were missing in life, finding it and then questioning it – because there was always Monsters out there.
And then – just when you thought all was lost – you pick up the phone and dialled and say……..
"Deep down….are you evil??"
And he responds with a smile and a laugh. And you know there are kind people out there, caring for you. It's just the Monsters thoughts and evilness clouding your ways.
And just while I was thinking this I looked at Evan and saw lovely butterfly rainbows toss around the room.
For there may be Monsters – but there are always those out there, ready to help.